Have you ever been on a bumpy, turbulent flight? The pilot’s steady voice comes out of the speakers announcing turbulence and a choppy ride, “Folks, the captain has turned on the fasten seatbelt sign”. If you are like me, you wait to hear, “Flight attendants, please be seated.” Initially, this announcement used to instill a sense of fear in me. I immediately felt lightheaded, checked my seatbelt and grabbed my armrests in anticipation of the worst. My mind raced - how could I protect myself from unrestrained objects, my seatmates, or a sudden drop?
In times of uncertainty, clients might say, “Tell me what to do.” But does telling someone what to do support them through a turbulent flight? As a Process Consultant, offering a quick fix is as unrealistic as believing I could safely land a plane gripping the armrest.
Recently, I had a conversation with a client facing a significant sense of uncertainty. She expressed, “I know this experience will be tough. I just want to say it out loud to remember that bumps and bruises, slips and falls are part of the journey.”
“Will there only be slips and falls or bumps and bruises?” I inquired.
“I just want to get through it!” she exclaimed.
As we discussed the uncertainties ahead, we explored ways to navigate them and what she could learn from the experience. “In what ways is this experience testing your leadership and organization? What information do you need to understand this situation?”
Through our dialogue she began to recognize she was leading her team through a challenging experience rather than merely enduring a difficult moment. By taking the time to understand the elements of organizational unrest, she was able to see the connections of parts to the whole. Her team’s impending challenges became an opportunity to gauge their readiness for turbulence and reveal gaps that needed addressing for a safe landing.
Her mindset shifted, “I can view my uncertainty as a process of learning. I don't have to surrender to the fear of the unknown or a lack of control. I can take ownership of how I act and respond. I will be fine.”
Clutching The Armrest Doesn’t Help Land The Plane.
When we try to control moments of disruption – whether in turbulent flights or challenging emotions - we force ourselves to take charge of the uncontrollable - it is exhausting and shortsighted. Eckhart Tolle defines stress as being “here” but wanting to be “there,” or being in the present while longing for the future. "I want this to be over" or "tell me what to do" are questions to hang on to something for safety rather than understanding the mechanics of what is happening and trust the process can be informative and safe. When we shut down and wish this to be over, we miss so much of what is happening around us. Enter the turbulence with curiousity and awareness. What can I learn from my seat mate’s response, how can I take care of them?
As our clients navigate turbulence, how can we help them “learn their way forward"? How can we move through the experience together? We don't grab them by the shoulders and say, “Grab the manual, let’s land this now!” or “Stop having feelings!” As consultants and coaches, our role is to be alongside our clients - not only to learn but to understand their experiences and help them apply their insights.
Partner at Design Group International
t yourself in an immersive environment. Visit an aquarium where you can be surrounded by fish.
Comments