WHO ARE YOUR TRUTH-TELLERS?
Kristin Evenson, Maestro-level leader facilitator
A pivotal juncture in my life as a leader came in an unsuspecting, hanging-with-good-friends moment 20-some years ago.
We were taking turns sharing our current joys and challenges. My turn to share focused on an initiative I was leading about which I felt impatient, frustrated, and urgent. “Work with me, people!” I exclaimed as I wrapped up my sharing—as if my team and colleagues were in the room with us. It’s what I truly wanted to say to them and implied the picture I had in my head of a train leaving the station, me seeing the destination, and my need for my team to just trust me, not delay us with questions, and to just get on board the train to the destination I very clearly saw.
I thought it was justified in the spirit of GSD (get stuff done) leadership. And, I thought, a charming testimony to my GSD leadership style.
But my friends didn’t respond to what I saw as “others’ unnecessary delay” nor with a tribute to my leadership gifts. They honed in on my phrase, “Work with me, people!” and said they found it noteworthy that I smacked the back of my hand when I said it. (What?). And that I said and did this often. (Double What?!?)
I don’t recall them saying much more than that. But that little dose of truth called my attention to something I’d been unaware of, then became curious about, that grew into a revelatory and pretty painful dose of hard personal reality: Once I see a strategic way forward, that’s all that
matters to me. The time needed for others to wrestle through and even ask important questions is a big ol’ waste of my time. Train’s leaving the station, folks—just get on board.
Years later, I can now reflect on my career journey and see this shadow-side tendency and its impact quite clearly…which is ironic given how differently I saw (and, let’s be honest, didn’t see it) at the time.
I’ll be ever grateful for my gracious truth-tellers, whose honest response led to a new way of living and leading—which honors others’ perspectives and collective readiness.
As leaders, we all need truth-tellers. Who are yours?
-Kristin